The other side of suicide.

How dare you run from me.

How dare you wait until your life was flashing before your eyes to call for help.

I trusted you.

I cared for you.

And all I receive in return is a cold shoulder and your vomit of lies.

What other dirty secrets hide behind your skin and pulse through your bloody veins?

Why is it that chugging a suicide cocktail seemed more inviting than cracking your lips to speak?

I can't bear this again.

I don't suppose that you have ever glanced further than the end of your thoughtless nose.

And I certainly can't conceive why when you let your chin drop to your chest for what you thought was the last time, it gave you any relief.

I didn't know that it was that gruesome...

to wake up everyday on a soft, warm bed

to have food in your stomach

to have so many people call you "friend"

While you thought you were breaking free you didn't take one single second to stop and think about how many shackles you'd be leaving around the ankles of those you left behind.

You didn't take one moment to contemplate the desolation you'd leave the rest of us in.

I just hope you know now, what you didn't know then.

I hope you realize that you are loved far beyond your comprehension.

You are my family

You are my friend

Although you've shattered the reverence and trust I once had for you

These deep wounds will heal and these scars will eventually fade..

You'll always be my cousin and that's the way I want it to stay.